Regrets

Dear all,

I wanted to end this blog with that simple 'I'm sorry', but I figured I owe at least an explanation to everyone who has supported this blog in one way or the other. The reason why I decided to terminate this blog is because the original reason for its creation and existence, is now gone. There is no point for me in continuing blogging anymore. I'm sorry for letting everybody down, but I hope you can understand that this is something I have to do. But who knows, maybe, and just maybe, I'll be back someday.

Regrets,
Jing Zhi

BORING BORING HOLIDAYS!!

I went out with Jasmine for pool several days ago, but it was raining heavily, so we sat down in this kopitiam and ordered Rojak, waiting for the rain to subside.

Jasmine and her very hot lesbian friend, Ning

I've known Jasmine for about nearly 5 years now, we used to play basketball at Braddel Heights CC. She has a hot sister, sorry make it 3 hot younger sisters and a obese brother. She's eldest in the family, and owns a plastic vibrator that she named "Xuannie". *snort*

She moved to East Coast about 2 months ago, so its very hard for me to jio her out for basketball anymore.

So, as I was saying, we had rojak, and when the rain finally stopped, we went to play pool at Toa Payoh snookerium. On the way home, I was messing with her bag and I found this:

I swear to God I had no idea what it was initially. So I asked her "What, you bring wet tissue with you all the time?"

She blushed and snatched back the "wet tissue" from me and said softly "Thats not wet tissue, you idiot!"

For those sua-ku + kum gongs like me, this is a lesson learnt.

1. Never, ever mess with girl's bag. Its blood-stained.

2. From now onwards, NEVER assume that girls bring wet tissues. Expect the unexpected.

3. Ask before you touch anything, cus now I'll never strike 4D. :(

Alright. Enough of this Kotex disguising as wet tissue thing *shiver*. I went overnight fishing with the NP angler people yesterday. I reached an hour earlier cus I mis-read the meeting time and ended up stoning at Bedok MRT station for an hour before they arrived. Thank God Amanda entertained me, or else I think I would have been bored to death.

From there, we took a cab down to East Coast Park carpark lot F1 and walked in to Bedok Jetty. Upon reaching the jetty, we set up our rods and thus, fishing begins.

Thats my area. I was the only idiot who didn't bring hammock and so I ended up sleeping on the hard, stony chair.

The rest of the people, sleeping comfortably in their hammocks.

Bedok jetty looks very majestic at around 6-7am. The sky starts lightening up slowly, the gentle wind beating upon our faces, the bustling of activites starts taking place and so on. You can see uncles and aunties riding their bicycles here, trying their luck for big fishes.

First catch of the day! A pufferfish got caught, and we threw it back to the sea cus its inedible. Well, thats about it. Nothing much to blog about that day cus we (as in me and the NP angler people) don't really click. Its like.. Powerpuff Girls and Sasame Street. We are colleagues from Kids Central but we don't mix. So, I'm jio-ing people to go fishing with me. Anyone wants in?

Well, thats about it. Random picture of the day!

Thats QianHui. Single and available. Anyone interested?

OH HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

9th September marks the day I was born, but surprisingly, I didn't really feel the "kick" of the special day yesterday.

Its not because the F4 (Leon, Kenneth and Yee Seng) didn't "jio" me out, but rather because I feel I'm getting older. I'm hitting the end of my teenage years. I'm getting old. I have wrinkles up my ass, I have white hair, I'm afraid of not being able to control my bladders, and wetting my bed unknowingly. I'm afraid of having to wear diapers, while my grandson/grand-daughters point and laugh at me. I'm afraid of not being able to chew properly because all my teeth have fallen off, and the dentures do not fit. I'm afraid that I'll have to work at Macdonald when I'm old, selling hambugs, because I outlive my savings.

But I'm not afraid of dying. I neither fear nor welcome it. I just hope that when it comes, it strikes the person next to me first. :D

Alrighty! Enough of emo-talks. Pictures!

We (my ITE friends and I) went down to Marina Square and had Pizza Hut there. We ordered 3 pizzas; the stuffed-crust thingie, the Hawaiian and the Spicy Chicken Supreme. It was a package, and it came with mushroom soup and drinks.

The Hawaiian was H-E-A-V-E-N-L-Y. The melted cheese and the turkey bacon tasted out of this world right down to the very last bite of the crust. With the combination of additional cheese and chilli powder, I think it should take over the slogan of "Finger Licking Good". All in all, simply orgasmic!

After dinner, we sat there and chat for a moment, when suddenly the waitress brought out a almond cheesecake and they started singing the birthday song to me. It was a very touching sight, and I almost, I said almost ah, cried.

Left to right, bottom to top: Qian Hui, Xiao Qin, Afida, Some handsome I don't really remember, and Sharahoudin. Of couse they were not the only people there, other people included are LC, sharan, Jovin, Kelvin and.. *ahem* Her.

Thats me, holding a slice of the birthday cake, smiling like a retard.

After dinner, we went bowling and played abit pool at Marina Square, and I caught a movie, "Monster House" with Her. Not very nice, but they say its the person you catch the movie with, and not the movie, that matters.

It was getting pretty late then, I sent Her home, and took a cab down to Granny's house. I saw baby Olivier there and she's getting skinnier! :(

Her parents must have ill-treated her! Never mind, I shall kidnap her and raise her bai bai pang pang!

Anyway, this was how Olivier looked like 2 months ago:

"Kua Si Mi?!"

"I'm Cute! Lalala"

"I'm Zoe Tay, eh no I'm Olivier Teh!"

But now she looks like this:

Oh! Sorry! wrong baby. That is the future Ronald Macdonald!

Anyway, presenting Olivier as of yesterday:

My parents ill-treat me :(

"I'm MISERABLE. HELP MEEE!!"

"Jing Zhi, Adopt me! I wanne be yours!"

"God help me :("

Morale of the story: Don't take Slim 10.

The one about Crappy Jobs and Stupid Games

It was Yee Seng's birthday yesterday, but he sacrificed it for a crappy job..

It all started 2 days ago, when I came across an article on the Strait Times on a company recruiting 25 "fun-loving" people for a job that involves conning people of their hard-earned money selling "donation tickets" to people.

Of course I rang the company up. I love fun. But usually, it involves being around girls. :D

So, poor Leon, Yee Seng and I went down to bugis 2 days ago for the so-called "interview". It was a pretty tense moment inside the interview room, until the boss asked Yee Seng: "So, how much are you expecting for your salary?"

Yee Seng, who has no working experience, apart from helping his mom out at a souvenir shop at Sentosa was shocked and muttered, "erm.. around $700-$800 dollars.."

Then, the King of Con, I mean the Boss said "That is... BULLSHIT!"

Made Leon and I laughed our ass off. The way he said "Bullshit" was damn funny. It sounded like "Pu-Shit!" Bey Tahan ah!

Then, he went on about the "career prospect", working hours and the pay, which he said "Don't worry, you can hit $1k EASILY.

That is PU-SHIT!

Then he went on to the next question: "Now, give me one good reason why I should hire you." And Yee Seng gave the corniest answer I've ever heard.

"I have no experience, but I am willing to work hard."

WAHAHAHAHA!!! WTF?! Isn't that the corniest line you've ever heard?

"I have no experience, but I am willing to work hard!"

He(The king of con) told us that work commences the next day, on Yee Seng's birthday and so we have to come down to start our training.

So, like little idiots ("little" referring to Yee Seng and I. Leon old liao, so he is Big idiot), we went down the following day and we're introduced to various con-men who worked there. It turns out that company is selling "Donation Tickets" to help the Elderly, homeless kids and ex-convicts.

"100% of the proceeds will go to charity." he (the King of con) said.

"Pu-shit!" I thought.

I have had experience with this kind of job. The company draws a certain percentage of the total proceeds and pocket them, while little suckers like Yee Seng and I, Big for Leon actually also draw a small percentage of the money for our salary, food and transport.

So, if you work your mathematics, the actual proceeds that reach the hands of the needy is very pathetic.

So, we spend the whole morning, trying to stop people and sell them the $10 donation tickets.

It was hardwork, mind you. Throughout the whole morning, the only thing I've said was "Zhe wei piao liang de xiao jie, wo bu shi mai dong xi de. Ke yi gei wo 30 miao de shi jian ma? Bang bang mang laa.." loosy translated as "Hey pretty babe, I'm not trying to sell you anything, can you spare me 30 seconds, please help help laa.."

It's a lie + con job. First, I have to call women who has belly bigger than mine as "Zhe wei piao liang de Xiao Jie", and I try to actually try to con them of their oily money. Ta ma de!

Leon couldn't take it, and call me at around 12 to tell me he quit. That sneaky commando told his leader that he has food poisoning and has to go home. So I went up to my leader and told him I wasn't cut out for the job, hence I quit.

Yee Seng did the same. And so we met up at National Library before heading down to Macdonald where we had our meals, played abut of pool and talked alot of cock at Yoshinoya, when I suddenly asked Yee Seng "So, give me 1 good reason why I should hire you.", while Leon asked "So, how much salary are you expecting?" Damn funny I tell you.

So, crap day, crap birthday, poor Yee Seng. But not bad la, at least Sin yee sang him a birthday song :D

Thats about it. Im going out now. My ITE mates are gonna celebrate MY BIRTHDAY in advance. Woo!

Its saddening to hear..

Steve Irwin passed away this afternoon after a stingray's barb( the tail portion) pierced through his chest, puncturing his heart.

For those who do not know Steve Irwin, he's a famous crocodile hunter from Sydney, Australia. He's one of the reason why I still watch Kids Central the other reasons being I love the Powerpuff Girls, the X'men and Justice League .

He used to fascinate me with his ways with deadly animals/reptiles/insects etc. He's just so.. natural. Its like he was born to do this. Its in his blood. People think that he's mad, looney and insane, exposing his baby to such dangers, but I think its brilliant. If I have a Dad like him, I'll be proud of him.

I can still remember vividly waking up early on Saturday morning watching "Croc Files" by Steve and his wife, Terri Irwin. I used to enjoy the "Fun-Facts" then. Come to think of it, it seems so.. yesterday..

"He came over the top of a stingray and the stingray's barb went up and went into his chest and put a hole into his heart," said Irwin's longtime producer John Stainton, who was with him at the time on Monday.

"It's likely that he possibly died instantly when the barb hit him, and I don't think that he ... felt any pain," a tearful Stainton told reporters in the city of Cairns. "He died doing what he loved best."

Well, at least he died something he loved best. No regrets. *sniff*

For all those who care, article of his death can be found here, and two videos that I find highly inspiring, yet touching is this and this.

Happy Birthday Andy

NOTE: THIS ENTRY IS RATHER LONG, SO I SUGGEST YOU GRAB SOME POPCORNS AND MAKE YOURSELF A DRINK. ENJOY!

Its Andy's (Kenneth's friend) birthday, and Kenneth decided to destroy celebrate it by "inviting" him to watch aeroplane with us. That sneaky bastard.

It would be better if they name it "RSAF SUANA HOUSE 2006"

So, we met at Eunos at 1000 hours, and as usual, Kenneth was late. *Cough* Asshole *cough*

From there, we took a shuttle bus to Paya Lebah Airbase. Nabei, the queue was so bloody long, by the time we managed to board the bus, it was nearing noon.

When we alighted the bus, it was sweltering hot. Then Yee Seng's period came and he wasn't wearing kotex, so he gave me the "No mood la.. don't kajiao me or else I will fuck you upside down, inside out" when I messed with him.

"I turn left, there was people, I turn right, there was people, I look up, NABEI! THERE WAS AEROPLANES"

It was so freaking crowded and damn bloody hot. I cannot over-emphasize on how hot it was down there cause practically everyone of us got sunburnt except for Andy cus he's already chao-tah.

Introducing the attack helicopter, the "Lampaji". Wait, what? Its "Apache", not "Lampaji"? Gee.. No wonder the pilot gave me such a dirty look when I asked if I could touch his "Lampaji"..

Believe it or not, the Lampaji Apache is the state of the art technology. The mushroom thing on top is actually a radar. It can detect enemies from a distance of 8km away, and apart from that, pilot actually keep several cans of "Campbell" mushroom soup there in case they ever get hungry.

You're a sucker if you believe my bullshit about the campbell soup thing.

But seriously, the Apache is so advanced that if for example, the pilot looks left, the gattling gun that is located directly below his ass, below the plane will rotate to the left. Cool right?

This, my friend, is the "Chin-bye". What?! Wrong again? Oh! Its Chin-hook.. CRAP!

This, the Chin-hook, is also one of the spectaculars there. According to the technicians there, it can carry up to 20 tonnes of weight. Thats about the weight of 29 Toyota Corollas. The picture of the chin-hook might be puny here, but in reality, its HUMONGOUS!

Some other planes:

Thats Yee Seng down there, trying his "Opps, I did it again, I walked into your camera UNKNOWNINGLY! You see his facial expression! So natural! Confirm arm-chio to himself one!

If i remember correctly, this is the 741. It has a Eagle crest by the side. Looks majestic, but function wise, I have no idea.

I really cant remember what this big-ass plane is called. But it is easily twice the size of other planes there. Its nearly the size of a Chin-hook. Its used for fuel transfere up in the air, and also parachuting purposes.

Another big-ass plane that I cant remember. But this one looks pretty harmless. So, whats it doing in RSAF. It looks like those old old SIA planes. *shrugs*

This is the gadget they use to shoot aeroplanes down. There will be 2 riders by the side for reloading purposes, I think, and 1 guy in the centre, controlling the angle and rotation of it. Don't underestimate this heavy piece of shit, it can rotate pretty fast.

I seriously have no idea what a bunch of missles are doing in the middle of the road. But everytime I look at it, I cannot help thinking about exploding darts.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is the F5s Tiger. Operated by only 1 pilot, the F5s tiger has an air-conditioned cock, I mean cockpit! What is wrong with me!? Other weapons include the Air-to-ground missile, laser guilded bombs and cluster bombs. Don't ask me what those are, all I know is its enough to kick my ass upside down, inside out. *shivers*

The F5 is also an attack plane, but word has it that the F5's job is to protect the F16s while the F16 launches the attack. I'm not sure whether its true or not, but hey, its interesting, isn't it?

Missiles attached to the sides of the F5. Scary~

Drinks are rather expensive there. Those who are thinking of visiting the airbase remember to bring your own drinks. It's quite important.

*Gasp!* Yee Seng heard the Missile talking to him!

Behold! This is the F16 jet fighter plane. Unlike the F5s, the F16 is operated by 2 pilots. One of them shall drive the plane and the other shall wipe the sweat off the pilot's face.

Ok. I lied.

The job of the pilot behind is actually to fire weapons and kill enemies. :D

If I remember correctly, this is the F16D. If u look carefully, there is a smiley mouth below the plane, and I came out with this theory that the F16D is happy to kill people. Hence the smiley mouth is created. Logical right?

There was an aerial show at 17oo hours, and it was amazing. Definately a must-watch event once in your life. Journey back to Eunos by the shutter bus was very long. The queue was even more worst then the journey there.

When we reached Eunos, we were hungry like shit. So we ordered a whole chicken, 6 dollars worth of Kang Kong and alot of rice. But hey, whats the worry. I'm skinny. :D

Agree?

The One On Transvestite

Daisy and I was having this chat on Transvestites a.k.a "Ah guas" to us Singaporeans. I don't know how we got to the topic, but earlier on we were chatting about hot babes. I seriously cannot imagine what will happen if my "hot babe" told me that she's actually a guy. Imagine this:

On our wedding night:

My hot babe: "Honey, I have something to tell you.."

Me: "What is it, my love?"

(Hot Babe takes out a guy photo from her wallet)

Me: "Is that your ex-boyfriend? Sweetie, you know I don't mind.."

Hot babe: "No darling, thats me before operation.."

On thier wedding night, Jing Zhi found out that his "wife" has more than just eye-ball balls.

WAA!!!! SCARY AHHHH!!!

Therefore, I shall make it a point to *ahem* "check" my girlfriend before I get married. *Grins*

Okay, that was a joke. Don't think too badly of me, girls.

So, anyway back to our topic on "ah guas", introducing:

Korean Ah Guas:

Guys, don't even start erecting. The pictures on top are GUYS. Who know if one of them has a blog that goes by the address of www.ILoveKimChiSoup&IHaveBigBalls.Blogspot.com. LOL

And introducing our..

China Ah Guas:

Wa. Such rare beauty. Screw Korea, I'm definately going China someday. Anyone wanna tag along?